How To Build Habits?

Yesterday

Getting ahead of 99% of people is simple, but not easy.

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence isn’t a one-time event — it’s the result of small things done consistently over a long time. Every reaction, every outcome, every “overnight success” comes from habits we’ve practiced for months or years.

Last year, I built a couple of habits that I’ve been doing every single day. In Feb, it’ll be one full year of consistency — and trust me, I now understand what it actually takes to build and keep good habits.

It all started with a book I always wanted to read — Atomic Habits. I didn’t find time to read it, so I listened to the audiobook early last year. But here’s a brutal truth I learned quickly:

Reading books or listening to pods don’t change your life. Implementation does.
Reading or listening to good things gives you direction. Doing gives you results.

So after finishing the book, I decided to actually apply the ideas. Before getting into the concepts that helped me the most, let’s start with a simple exercise from the book. This alone can give you more clarity than any motivational video.

Identify Your Current Habits

You probably already know which habits are good or bad, but many people are not even aware of what they actually do in a day. So here’s the exercise:

Write down every single thing you do from waking up to sleeping.
Next to each item, put:

+ if it’s a good habit
– if it’s a bad habit
= if it’s a neutral habit

If you’re unsure whether something is good or bad, ask yourself:

Does this habit help me become the person I want to be?

Your honest answer will tell you everything.

Now you have:

A list of current habits
A list of habits you want to build

Let’s move to how you actually build the new ones.

1. Be Specific And Clear

Whatever habit you want to build, write a clear plan:
What, When, and Where.

Example:

“I will meditate for 5 mins at 9 AM in my hall.”

Clarity > motivation.

If you don’t know when to start — start today.
Don’t wait for monday, next month, or New Year. That’s procrastination disguised as planning.

2. Habit Stacking

This is one of the best concepts from Atomic Habits.

You already have habits you’ve been doing for years — waking up, brushing, bathing, brewing coffee, checking your phone, etc.
Use these existing habits to attach new ones.

Habit stacking formula:

After current habit, I will do new habit.

Example:

After I take a bath, I will meditate for 5 minutes.

This works because your brain loves routines.
If the “current habit” always happens, the “new habit” has a higher chance of happening.

3. Make It Obvious And Easy

Reduce friction.
Make the habit so simple and obvious that your brain has no reason to avoid it.

Example:

If you want to meditate after bath, place your meditation cushion right next to your clothes shelf.
When you open it after your bath, it’s right there in front of you.

Human behavior naturally follows the path of least effort.
Make the right thing easier than the wrong thing.

Bonus: How to Break Bad Habits

Breaking bad habits is simply the reverse of building the good ones.

If building a habit = make it obvious, easy, attractive, and satisfying.

Then breaking one means:

Make it invisible (remove triggers)
Make it hard (increase friction)
Make it unattractive (change the story you tell yourself)
Make it unsatisfying (add consequences)

Examples:

Want to stop doom-scrolling?
Put your phone in drawer while working.
Want to stop snacking?
Don’t keep snacks at home.
If you really want it, you’ll have to go out and buy it — and you won’t.
Want to stop waking up late?
Put your alarm far from your bed so you have to stand up to turn it off.

The secret of self-control is a disciplined environment.
For good habits: make queues obvious.
For bad habits: make queues invisible.

it’s easier to avoid temptations than to resist them.

Bad habits die when you remove their fuel.
Good habits grow when you remove their friction.

4. Commit To 40 Days

Whenever I start a new habit, I commit to doing it for 40 days straight.

Some say 21 days is enough to build a new habit — I disagree.
21 is too short time to make a habit feel like a part of your identity.
40 days is the sweet spot: not too short, not too long.

But let’s be realistic — you might miss a day. It happens.

Just remember this golden rule:

Never miss twice.
Missing once is an accident.
Missing twice is the beginning of a new (bad) habit.

One of my favorite quotes that kept me disciplined is:

The days you don’t want to are the days you have to.

Motivation helps you start. Discipline keeps you going.

The Main Problem: Why Do We Fail After Some Time?

Even after doing everything right — clear plans, habit stacking, environment design — most people still fail to sustain habits for long-term.

Why?

Because the mind is not in their control.
They are in the control of their mind.

And this is where one of the most powerful concepts comes in — something deeper than habits, deeper than psychology.

Pratyahara - The Secret Behind Strong Willpower

The fifth limb of Patanjali’s Ashtanga Yoga.
I’ll explain it simply.

Pratyahara = reducing the “food” you give to your senses and mind.
(Not physical food — mental food.)

Your mind becomes strong or weak based on what you feed it.

There’s a famous example:

A wise man once asked,
“If you have two bulls of equal strength and a week later, you make them fight each other, which one will win the fight?”
The answer: the one you feed more.

Your mind works exactly the same way.

Every time you satisfy your impulses:

“Let me sleep 1 more hour”,
“Let me scroll for 10 minutes”,
“I’ll start tomorrow"

you’re feeding the wrong bull.

Example:

You set an alarm for 5 AM.
The alarm rings.
Your mind says, “It’s cold… sleep more.”

If you listen, you feed the mind.
You make it stronger.
And once it becomes strong, controlling it becomes almost impossible.

Pratyahara means:

Reduce unnecessary stimulation.
Reduce instant pleasures.
Reduce feeding the wrong bull.

You weaken the mind’s impulses.
You strengthen your willpower.
And that is how habits turn into identity.

Final Thought

Habits aren’t built by motivation, hacks, or quotes.

They’re built by:

clarity
repetition
reducing friction
not missing twice
and most importantly, controlling the mind instead of being controlled by it

Once you understand this, habits stop feeling like a struggle and start feeling like your nature.

Start small.
Start today.
Your future self will thank you.